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Survivor's Creation

Poetry by Katherine

Poetry by Katherine

When a Fire Bird Freezes

Survivor, such a strange label

Does it really apply to me?

I’d suppose everyone is really

From a cripple pulling on his favourite 

Socks, to a working class family

Having run bare foot from Grenfell Tower

Smudged faces, bruises and cuts

The bittersweet pain of having escaped

The Survivor’s Trust web page glaring 

From my phone at 4.35AM…again

There is no sweetness to my tears

I only taste a bitterness and then

The ‘Myth busting’ section draws me in

A bodiless voice with no name, speaks 

Softly in my ear –

‘If you reacted this way during an assault

Know that it was not your fault’ goes on

I have heard these words before from 

Familiar faces, they have rushed off 

The tongue like a swarm of fairies 

Desperate to flick their wands and 

Disappear us all from this present 

It is a gift for which I am not entirely

Ungrateful, on seeing this Internet text

My tears burst forth like a geyser, inside

Something has sunk a little deeper,

The faintest honey smell begins to linger 

And with that man’s intrusion

A party for all past demons to rock n roll

They travel far, pay no toll, in the early 

Hours but mine is a chance to make 

Accommodation with them all!

No more will I be disappointed 

At my brain’s freezing on the spot 

Or punish my body over and over with too

Much alcoholic stupor, I will not live 

In a paralysis that has no purpose

I look back on my calendar to that day

And realise with great surprise – I was busy!

It was more than attack, I was at a fayre 

My boy’s school, then dancing with my 

Friends.. A slight beer fear after that’s all

Flood my mind with good memories

Fractured though they are, give me a

Shield, some armour for the court 

Help me, steal back as he stole so easily

What is mine, I ask the ether 

As I drift off back to sleep