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I didn’t marry a monster

I didn't marry a monster

Launched during the Sexual Abuse and Sexual Violence Awareness week, Ola and her partner Olu created this video which we are honoured to share to highlight marital rape and to help break the silence surrounding this taboo subject. 

“Marriage, like a lot of other relationships, is not without its acceptable flaws. However, this does not include sexual abuse or rape by your spouse.

Over the years, I have found, within real and virtual social circles, that marital ‘rape’ is a  hidden recurring issue which people, mostly females, are reluctant to open up about.

Further discussion on the subject is shut down with resignation that it has to be accepted and nothing can be done about it.

On the other hand, there is the acceptance that spousal rape is not possible.

These attitudes appear to be rooted in the belief of the traditional role of the spouse and misinterpreted religious directives mixed with a culture of shame/guilt, fear and acceptance that it is ok.

No, it is not OK. I believe everybody should feel safe and reasonably happy within marriage.

Using my capacity in acting/film making and our resources, my spouse and I made this film to highlight this problem and that there is help for those affected” – Ola

I didnt marry a monster insert

Marital rape has been a crime in the UK since 1991 but sadly in parts of the world where there are patriarchal societies there is no legislation to protect people in marriage against acts of rape. Often the key element missing when issues like this arise is whether there was mutual consent by both parties to engage in a sexual act. Consent to participate in any sexual act must always be given freely and willingly without any form of emotional, psychological or physical duress.

If you have been affected by this issue or would like to understand more about rape or sexual violence then please contact our National Helpline a call on 0808 801 0818. For our full opening hours, please click here.  

To find local support please visit our Find Support page.